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Lou Cunningham's avatar

These thoughts are very opportune at this time of the year. Do you equate feeling ‘hurt’ the same as feeling resentment? Gratitude in these difficult/past relationships may be a one way street but I guess the point is the freedom it gives you rather than expecting a mutual response. Very thought-provoking Kerry. Thank you.

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Kerry Howells's avatar

Thanks very much Lou. Yes, it can be a one-way street and that's why many play the waiting game as they are sick of being the ones who seem to be doing the work. This is all about us making the first move, as resentment would have us stuck there. Hurt comes first and then morphs into resentment if we can't let it go. Love your thoughts

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Nicole's avatar

Thank you Kerry for acknowledging small acts of deep gratitude are indeed huge steps forward, for the person giving this gratitude to another. And the notion of these small acts taking great humility and courage. Deep gratitude is a practice, a way of being and I love the knowing from you, that all of this takes time. So much goodness in this piece of writing. Thank you for your gift of articulating your messages so beautifully, even the challenge in it all lands ever so gently. Thank you, thank you.

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Kerry Howells's avatar

Thank you Nicole for this beautiful and affirming response. Aren't we blessed to be working on this together, with humility, courage, patience all holding up the trapeze! Can't wait to see how it all continues to unfold next year at your wonderful school.

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Margaret Wakeley's avatar

Thank you Kerry for this beautiful soul-searching piece. Grateful living is indeed a practice. I'm not there yet either, when it comes to some people, but I am practicing!

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Kerry Howells's avatar

Thank you dear Margaret my fellow gratitude traveller

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Les's avatar

So true Kerry. Gratitude and positivity in times of trauma and loss makes a world of difference in the healing process.

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Kerry Howells's avatar

So glad this resonated with you Lee

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Susan Westcott's avatar

Thanks Kerry

You remind me that I am an agnostic as I write my response to your message as perhaps I ought not be quoting the prophet “Jesus”

But this message makes me think Jesus would call considering gratitude a process of “turning the other cheek” the other one that never, quips with an ill word or defensive remark ( even in the middle eye or under our breath or,as a Shakespearean aside!).

It’s a takes two to tango a situation which keeps it (the my bad) going. Its the wisdom you and that bloke long gone but not forgotten that guides me to lift my game. I think I can try patience first then application of perspective with gratitude to defuse.

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Kerry Howells's avatar

Thank you for these wise words Susan. I absolutely agree that it takes two but one has to decide to stop the waiting game. Best wishes to you

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Diana iles's avatar

A very warm message, Kerry, to take into the New Year.

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Kerry Howells's avatar

Thanks Diana

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Lee Buchanan's avatar

Ah, I so needed to read that Kerry! Thank you.

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